Free Write Thursday
My body
The object of life
Something that uses all parts to work together
Something that once told to do, it does it
Fingers move on my command
Legs bend
Arms swing
My body
A breathing entity
A moving soul
Captivating emotion
Exchanging looks
Using words
Making sounds
My body
Moving
Jumping
Swinging
Screaming
Crying
Laughing
Smiling
My Body
Big crowds with people laughing
Large crowds of people cheering
Dancing, smiling
In my element
Snap
A shift
Big crowds scolding
Large crowds yelling
The walls are closing in
Stomach churning
I run out
Hoping to get away
I cant
I'm stuck
Mouth glued shut, feet glued down
My eyes scream for help
Anxiety.
Nervous.
Afraid.
I'm right here
Can't you see me?
When I was younger, my family wasn't all about going to church and God. My dad grew up in a strict catholic family which turned him into an atheist with the constant force of going to church and worshipping something he didn't believe in. My mother grew up the same way however, she began to stop. So, growing up we only went to church when I was with my grandparents and on Holidays. Things then went downhill with the perfect structure of my family. My parents began to resent each other which ended in them splitting up. Because of this, my mom moved to Dallas, Texas to be closer to family and my dad kept us kids in Tennessee. My dad became a different man throughout the years. This effected me to where I wasn't allowed to see my mom anymore. I was alone. All of my siblings were much older which allowed them to leave. I on the other hand, had to stay. It made me wonder. If God is so good like everyone says, why is he doing such bad? I had hated him for this and I grew a hate towards all the people that talked of such good things about the Lord. I would try to pray but just ended up hating him even more for the pain he has caused. Then an Angel had swooped down for me. A women named Charlotte had met me and invited me to go to a church nearby to attend the services and maybe even go to her youth group. I thanked her for the offer but I had told her that I had a busy schedule, which was a complete lie. I thought about it everyday after. Then one day I woke up and decided to go. She came by my house to pick me up and we went. Walking into the church felt so warm and sweet. Like walking into my Grandma's house. Every one welcomed me so kindly that it made me feel like I had known them for years. The service started with worship. People rose their hands high in the air as they sang the songs. It was so beautiful to me, the way they were so involved in it. Once the final song ended, a man came onto the stage asking for everyone to join hands in prayer. As we did this beautiful clutter of words left his mouth,"God as we bow our heads in prayer today please take the hurt out of the peoples hearts and cleans us of our sins," he said. He then ended the prayer and started his sermon. After this day, I began to pray as much as I could. I would talk to God about my problems and I would ask for help. Then one day my mom came back to Tennessee to bring me to Texas. My life has changed in the best ways ever since. I now believe that God is good and that he is great.
The object of life
Something that uses all parts to work together
Something that once told to do, it does it
Fingers move on my command
Legs bend
Arms swing
My body
A breathing entity
A moving soul
Captivating emotion
Exchanging looks
Using words
Making sounds
My body
Moving
Jumping
Swinging
Screaming
Crying
Laughing
Smiling
My Body
Big crowds with people laughing
Large crowds of people cheering
Dancing, smiling
In my element
Snap
A shift
Big crowds scolding
Large crowds yelling
The walls are closing in
Stomach churning
I run out
Hoping to get away
I cant
I'm stuck
Mouth glued shut, feet glued down
My eyes scream for help
Anxiety.
Nervous.
Afraid.
I'm right here
Can't you see me?
When I was younger, my family wasn't all about going to church and God. My dad grew up in a strict catholic family which turned him into an atheist with the constant force of going to church and worshipping something he didn't believe in. My mother grew up the same way however, she began to stop. So, growing up we only went to church when I was with my grandparents and on Holidays. Things then went downhill with the perfect structure of my family. My parents began to resent each other which ended in them splitting up. Because of this, my mom moved to Dallas, Texas to be closer to family and my dad kept us kids in Tennessee. My dad became a different man throughout the years. This effected me to where I wasn't allowed to see my mom anymore. I was alone. All of my siblings were much older which allowed them to leave. I on the other hand, had to stay. It made me wonder. If God is so good like everyone says, why is he doing such bad? I had hated him for this and I grew a hate towards all the people that talked of such good things about the Lord. I would try to pray but just ended up hating him even more for the pain he has caused. Then an Angel had swooped down for me. A women named Charlotte had met me and invited me to go to a church nearby to attend the services and maybe even go to her youth group. I thanked her for the offer but I had told her that I had a busy schedule, which was a complete lie. I thought about it everyday after. Then one day I woke up and decided to go. She came by my house to pick me up and we went. Walking into the church felt so warm and sweet. Like walking into my Grandma's house. Every one welcomed me so kindly that it made me feel like I had known them for years. The service started with worship. People rose their hands high in the air as they sang the songs. It was so beautiful to me, the way they were so involved in it. Once the final song ended, a man came onto the stage asking for everyone to join hands in prayer. As we did this beautiful clutter of words left his mouth,"God as we bow our heads in prayer today please take the hurt out of the peoples hearts and cleans us of our sins," he said. He then ended the prayer and started his sermon. After this day, I began to pray as much as I could. I would talk to God about my problems and I would ask for help. Then one day my mom came back to Tennessee to bring me to Texas. My life has changed in the best ways ever since. I now believe that God is good and that he is great.
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